tags

On the Trigger

Posted on Updated on

Sometimes I have this vision
of me loading all your words all into a gun
as if they were bullets
aiming at point blank range
so close, I can fell your heart beat against the muzzle
my finger on the trigger
no witness around to say I did it
so shut up
don’t say one more thing
or my finger just may build enough courage to pull it
even though I know I couldn’t shoot enough rounds
after reloading a couple times
for you to feel it
to feel the same lies
the same agony
the same shame
 the same shots you rang out
as my heart was the target and  I was the range
so please don’t say anything
because the words you speak are the reason why we are here now
with this automatic pointed at your chest
and your words bound
I have turned this pain into power now
with the ability to take life and love away
devastate your entire being in the same way you did me
find my way back in your life
just to break you down, while I watch you smile
I should let these bullets fly
while looking only into your eyes
I want you to know how it feels
to have love die inside
after thinking  you were living the best days of your life
and then falling apart after deliberately being hit by the love of your life
see you are my hearts glitch
and I’m trying to find when I fell for you like this
you are no longer my hearts power on switch
so as I lift this pistol,
this is not the time to pitch your sorriest apologies
or grab my hand to clinch
and as I aim I rather you not flinch
for the reason that this gun I drew
is still deciding whether this bullet is still for you