creative

Love you

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I told you I love you
and I didn’t think the amount of time it took for me to tell  you
would be equivalent to the amount of time it would take for you to take yours back
and now I wish I could take it all back
keep it to myself
because you showed me how quickly your mind can change

and that makes me question
it you truly loved me in the first place
but I still find myself loving you
because I have always been incapable of reversing the truth
and then letting it slip away
I pray that this is true to you too
because the last time we were good together
you said those three words
and if i know your heart like I thought I did
in a month those words are incapable of change
you need time, but what is time
when the person I love, in the last couple weeks
is not in my life, if we love we should be by each others side
and why does needing you the most
have to be right now, when we find ourselves mentally at our worst
you should be with me
we are going to go through things
but in this time we should be working on coming out of it together
not allowing space to draw us further apart from each other.
I love you, I love you for the reason that you are so different from me
and I love you for loving me first
and doing things that I would never see myself doing, because we both know my pride will get in the way
I love you for the strength that you remind me that I have
I love you for recognizing that there is no need for me to worry
and I love you for doing things that I don’t expect, like flowers when we first met
and I love you for putting up with my annoyance
when nobody else will
and I love you for allowing me to be your black hippie
and i love you for teaching me how to love
and I love you because you listen
and I love you because u develop a lisp when you smile at me
and still try to speak
you encourage me
and I love you because when I haven’t been around you in a while

I sense how nervous you are
And I love you because neither of us can dance
and I love you because neither one us ever wants the other to take the blame
and I love you because I know truly you haven’t fell out of love with me
i love you because when I hope you would call
you just show up
and I love you because I could think of so many more reasons
why I want to tell you I love you in person
and I love you because in every moment that you are in I want to be in it with you
I can’t stand that it will come to an end
I still love you

Play into my Soul

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I guess you have no choice but to lie in bed thinking about love and there is no way of
Avoiding it..
Especially when ya heart decides to contact your mind without any prior notice.
And these headphones in my ears couldn’t play music to take my mind of this.
Because all the sounds and vocals, even rap lyrics all bring up a moment in my life that pertain to you.
And these poems I write have no other choice but to be about you.
And my words loving you is all they really wanted to do.
I wish my creativity could reflect another topic or a moment in my life when everything seemed to mean something.
But that probably won’t happen because Love was something that I thought would make me happy, But since it didn’t last, my heart refuses to be left broken. So I will continue to play these soulful tracks until my heart decides it’s ready to love again and I will continue writing these poems until my words finally want to express my feelings for another man.
Play on music because your playing right into my soul, which guided my pen to write my thoughts better than they ever did before…..

Protect My Home

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Protect my home
Not the housing that I am currently living in
But my heart because that is where the outside of my body can still find shelter in
My heart, just like my home is where my day starts with a mission and ends
And just like my home, my heart provides comfort and can put something back into working order again and mend
My heart is only place where I feel like every emotion inside of me bonds together like old friends
Each emotion that my living soul feels knows myself very well
And with affection and trust create these emotional sensations, that show
me who I really am in detail
Protect my home
This heart of mine is very fragile, despite the barbwire fence that I placed around it
If you ever had a chance at getting to know it
Understand that I had to fight with myself to let you in…and you were worth it
Protect my home
I rather you not steal from me or damage, this fragile territory
Because something so precious shouldn’t ever be stolen from one on purpose.
Don’t damage my delicate property
Because I’m not sure if there is anything to completely numb me
The pain feels like everything ended today. And nothing so hurtful is easy for one in love to bare or out weigh
So my heart has no choice but to lie heavy, until another walks all over it
Protect my home
Like if my heart were your mothers’
Because I don’t know of a man who would disregard a heart that is as beautiful as their first woman.
Protect my home
protect my heart
Even when it has trouble with the plumbing, when tears roll down a face and only long sleeves can catch them
Protect my heart when redecorating takes place, because I’m only improving things about myself to improve on things that will help us build the trust
Protect my heart when the electric is dwindling or the fire goes out
don’t Just walk away, because the anticipation of knowing you again will make new rose buds sprout
Protect my heart and I will be sure to protect yours, because my mother always told me, my heart is my home and I have to open it up for another to share the same address along with me